What are you asking Santa for this Christmas? Have you made a list or not? (Re-post)

Some of you guys may not do this, but there is a movement among women encouraging them to create a list of what they want in a guy/mate/husband and not settle until they find the guy who matches that list. I’ll admit…I’ve waffled on this one for years…alternately creating a list and then being disgusted at the entire process of trying to fit some PERSON to a list. 

Either way… I’ve learned new things about what I like and dislike with each year, continuously learning that my “list” becomes obsolete again and again.

So…even if we go with that list idea and find some person who fits the “ideal” what’s the guarantee that they will remain that person? I mean if you have some type…you know…”blonde, buxom and sassy.” What’s to say in 10 years she won’t wake up and decide to go brunette after she joins the gym to lose that extra 50 pounds because she has embraced the mini-van driving suburban lifestyle? Or you only go out with guys who “drive foreign cars, play golf and work in finance…oh and don’t forget the washboard abs.” What are you going to do if he comes home one day having lost his job because he totaled his Beamer on the way to an important client meeting and is now too depressed to play golf or stop eating? Admittedly…these are extremes and most of you would say you don’t pick someone based on qualities that surface-y.

Ok…I’ll give you that…after all…I don’t either. But what about things like humor, intelligence and spirituality? Most people would say those are really important qualities. But what promise is there that the smart person will always be committed to expanding their mind or won’t get a disease that steals their faculty of mind? Or you discover that their humor depends on situation and when life gets tough, the humor turns into sarcastic diatribes. Or even spirituality…the Buddhist who finds Jesus…the Christian who decides that God isn’t really that involved and what’s the point of prayer…the atheist who has a melt down because she feels that life is pointless. 

I suppose, I just realized that you could make your list and even check it twice but supposing that person fits your list…what promise is there that they will stay that person? And really…do you want to spend life with someone who stays exactly the same without growth and change? Not only that, but its highly likely that you are going to change as well and if that person picked you based on a list or type…how will the relationship withstand change?

What are the things you look for in a mate and how would you react if they disappeared?

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